Learning to be Retired

I am sitting at my kitchen table with my coffee and my laptop, looking out past the patio and over a couple of rooftops to the lake below thinking about why I have been unable to organize my thoughts to write a retirement post. Then this morning I read this blog post by Tamara Reddy and had an Oprah-sized ah ha moment.

Actually, I have had this same ah ha moment over and over and over. 🙂

Three months into my retirement and I am feeling a bit lost. Everybody I talk to and everything I read says it takes 1 – 3 years to feel settled after such a major life change. So of course, at only three months in, I have barely stuck my big toe in.  Of course I feel lost. It is normal.

Phew! It’s nice to know I’m normal! It’s normal to feel a bit displaced. To be tossing around and unable to settle one’s thoughts.

I keep telling myself that.

I have been very busy trying to replicate my life in Whitehorse.  I still feel that I must fill my every moment with productive work, and so I have tried to pack everything that I had planned for my retirement into these last three months.

Read dozens of books! Join community concert band! Join quilting guild! Join Fiber Arts guild! Bake bread! Try new recipes! Take quilting classes! Make friends! Lose the last of the weight! Become instantly fit!

Do do do! Produce produce produce! Time is my enemy and I am still fighting that.

I have not yet learned how to relax into a slower pace.

But I am working on it! Mornings last longer and longer as I sit with my coffee and read the blogs I follow. Walks are taken everyday, usually along the lake shore.

My advice to myself?

Dear Nita,
Just as your dance students learn how to be in their bodies in a new way , you are learning how to be in a new place in your life. Breathe! Relax into the movement. Don’t force it. Allow the new you to emerge as you dance your way into a new way of living. An inspired life, like an inspired dance performance, comes from a place of relaxation, understanding and joy.

About Nita

I retired early and moved to a new community. I blog about my adventures as I explore a new lifestyle. I write about quilting, knitting and needlework, about learning to sew my own garments, adventures in the kitchen and in the garden, dancing, hiking, yoga...life is my playground!
This entry was posted in Balance, Bellydance, Dancing, early retirement, Health, life, retirement, Salmon Arm and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Learning to be Retired

  1. fawnahareo says:

    “Just as your dance students learn how to be in their bodies in a new way , you are learning how to be in a new place in your life.” What a perfect analogy. <3

  2. I have heard your dilemma many times from my retired friends who all say that they feel guilty if they are not busy. Sometimes not being busy is just as productive as it gives you time to think and relax. My friends also say now that they are so busy having a great time that they wonder how they ever fitted work into their lives. Take time and just be. It will come to you in good time.

  3. Diane N. says:

    Nita, I think one of the most difficult things is to allow yourself time to relax and breathe after a lifetime of working and crazy schedules. Plus we are raised that we have to have something to show for our efforts. I continue to fight this myself, and I’ve been retired 3 years now. I’m glad to hear that you are taking more time for morning coffee each day. I think you will find your stride, but you can’t rush it. Take care, Diane

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